Negative Self-Talk › Submodalities

Submodalities for Negative Self-Talk

In short: Submodalities are the qualities of your mental images and sounds (size, distance, brightness, volume). Changing them often changes how strongly a thought affects you. Here is how to apply this neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) technique to harsh negative self-talk, step by step.

Why negative self-talk sticks

Negative Self-Talk often runs on an automatic inner sentence like "You always mess things up". Submodalities works on the structure of that experience rather than arguing with it, which can give you room to respond differently. Context: this most often shows up in everyday life.

Steps

  1. Think of harsh negative self-talk and notice the mental picture that comes with it.
  2. Note its qualities: Is it big or small? Close or far? Bright or dim? Color or black and white? Moving or still? Is there a voice, and what does it sound like?
  3. Change one quality at a time: push the image further away, shrink it, drain the color.
  4. If there's a critical voice, make it slower, quieter, or give it a silly cartoon tone.
  5. Keep the changes that reduce the intensity. Undo the ones that don't.
  6. Lock it in: imagine the image stays that way and notice how you feel now.

Example script

"When I think about it, the picture is big and close. I'll push it back... smaller... dimmer... and that voice saying 'You always mess things up' now sounds slow and far away, like a radio in another room."

The reframe

Old frame: "You always mess things up"

New frame: That voice is an old habit trying to keep me safe; I can answer it the way I'd speak to a good friend.

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Other NLP techniques for negative self-talk

Submodalities for other problems

Related techniques

Swish Pattern · Anchoring · Timeline Work

FAQ

Does submodalities work for negative self-talk?

Many people find submodalities a useful structured way to reflect on harsh negative self-talk, but there is little rigorous scientific evidence that NLP techniques work better than chance. Treat it as an experiment: try it a few times and keep what helps.

How long does it take?

Most people can run through these 6 steps in 5 to 15 minutes. Repeating the exercise over several days usually matters more than doing it once perfectly.

What is a good reframe for negative self-talk?

Instead of "You always mess things up", try: That voice is an old habit trying to keep me safe; I can answer it the way I'd speak to a good friend.

Is this the same as therapy?

No. This is a self-help exercise from neuro-linguistic programming. If negative self-talk is seriously affecting your work, health, or relationships, an evidence-based approach such as cognitive behavioral therapy with a licensed professional is a better first step.

What should I try if this doesn't help?

Try a related technique such as Swish Pattern, Anchoring, Timeline Work, or one of the other approaches for negative self-talk listed on this page.

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Background

Developed by Richard Bandler in the early 1980s; see Using Your Brain for a Change.

Sources and further reading

Honest note: Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) is a popular personal-development approach, but its scientific evidence base is limited and it is widely criticized as unsupported (Sturt et al., 2012). These exercises are self-reflection tools, not therapy or medical advice. If a problem is seriously affecting your life, please talk to a licensed professional.

Last updated 2026-10-16